Did my first coffee enema today. I have been doing a ton of research for this before I decided to try it. I ordered a kit from Aussie Health through Amazon and I purchased organic medium roast coffee from Whole Foods.

Here is what I did:

I woke up early and prepared the coffee, using 3 tablespoons of coffee in 8 cups of water. I boiled the ground coffee for a few minutes and then turned the heat down so it was simmering for about 20 minutes. Then I let it sit to cool to an appropriate temperature. What is an appropriate temperature? Well, when I was able to stick my finger in the coffee and it felt neither hot nor cold.

I made sure to have a green juice, but no food. And I made sure to go to the bathroom to remove as much from my colon as possible. The coffee needed some space!

While the coffee was cooling I prepared my area. I got a body pillow, bath towel, hand towel, wash cloth, phone (timer), Kindle (distraction) and vitamin E oil (lubricant). I placed these in the area by the toilet. I folded the body pillow in half and propped it against the wall. I covered the pillow with the bath towel.

I got out my Aussie Health Enema kit. I made sure all of the pieces were sterile (or as sterile as possible) and properly attached per the instructions. I hung the enema bag on the handle of the door, tucking the tubing into the bag for the time being.

Once the coffee was cool, I poured it into an 8-cup glass measuring cup slowly so that the grounds stayed in the pot (there was 6.5 cups left after boiling). I brought the coffee into the bathroom. Making sure the clip was closed on the tubing, I slowly poured about 3 cups of coffee into the enema bag while holding the tubing higher than the bag.

Then I took a deep breath, dropped my drawers, laid down, lubricated the tubing, inserted the tube tip, opened the clip, and paid attention to the sensations. It felt odd. I felt expansion, I felt gurgling, and I felt an urge to expel. I closed the clip, pulled out the tip and waited to see what would happen. I got a cramp. I tried to breathe through it. I placed my hands on my abdomen for their warmth, which helped a bit. I released about 1 cup of coffee into the bowels when my body had enough. I jumped up very quickly, while clenching my glutes, of course, and clumsily plopped down on the toilet seat, and just in time too. I did this several times, holding 1 to 2 cups of coffee for no more than 5 minutes before explosion.

This is what I learned…

• Make sure all air is out of the tubing – more air translates to trapped gas and the body trying to expel the gas. Can you say “coffee farts”? Kinda messy.
• Hold the tip of the tubing in place. One slip of the tubing and you have coffee splashing everywhere. Depending on the pressure, it looks like one of those things that you hook up to a hose with many small hoses that young children like to play with in the summer.
• Take your time releasing the coffee into the rectum. Too fast and your body may rebel. The resulting coffee fountain sprays a lot more area than the tubing can leak.
• Remove any stuff from the area that you don’t want to be potentially sprayed with coffee, and whatever other stuff was removed from your colon.

I made it through the 6.5 cups. And it really wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I did feel and hear a lot of gurgling. And while it wasn’t uncomfortable, per se, it was something that my body wasn’t used to, but it did get easier as I went along.

Afterwards, I really felt clean. I found my Drano! And I felt a bit stimulated energetically. I would do it again. I would like to work up to be able to hold the enema for 15 minutes.