I kept a daily journal for 6 weeks to chronicle the differences in my gut. I have added a few entries below.
Day 3, 9/17 (Monday morning): Slept hard until 2:30 a.m. Slept lightly until 4, dozed again until alarm woke me up. First day back to work after surgery. Felt relaxed at work. Looking at lunch and wondering, “How I am going to eat all of my food (my entire salad).
And I realized what just went through my mind. I was dumbfounded. Shocked. Amazed. Instead of wondering if I had enough food, like I have every waking day of my life, I WONDERED HOW I WAS GOING TO EAT ALL OF MY FOOD!
I almost cried right then and there. I seriously had tears in my eyes.
It was the first time ever that I didn’t feel controlled by my appetite.
Strangely, while not realizing that I had been controlled by my appetite. EVERYDAY. The emotions that ran through my body, and are still running through my body, are not usually found together: joy, shock, relief, amazement … with tears.
Day 10, 9/24 (Monday): Woke up at 1:17 a.m. all of a sudden. Was wide awake. But did go back to sleep. Woke up at 3:30. Peed. Couldn’t go back to sleep. Tried heart meditation. Not successful. Tired. No stomach pain. Did a few things. Felt grateful. Was able to do meditation. Stomach is fine, no pain, no apparent hunger. But feeling tension in shoulders for the first time since taking remedy. (Notes: 1. Forgot minerals. 2. Also saw an email from the oncologist saying I needed 4 or 5 drugs … My entire body responded, a visceral response, saying, “No!” 3. And making appointments for pet scan and blood draw.) It is very strange to go from a stomach that is always starving to not very hungry. Only ate half of a small lunch. Weird. Took a walk. My entire body is throbbing. It subsided in 20 minutes or so. Melissa met me at home. Noted shoulders were not even … probably a source of muscle tension from protecting my surgical site. She worked on me, including the microstimulation. Had lots of gas. I went to bed at 8 p.m. with meditation audio playing.
Day 18, 10/2 (Tuesday): Woke at 1:15 a.m. to pee. Practiced power pose and gratefulness for healing. Back to sleep. Woke to alarm. Was having a dream when the alarm went off. I had to pee and my stomach hurt under my sternum. Pressed there, got gurgling noise, pain subsided. Easy day at work. Home, meditated, ate, picked Ian up and went to Boy Scouts. Sleep at 8:45 p.m. Woke at 11:50 p.m. to pee.
Day 21, 10/5 (Friday): Woke at 12:15 a.m., 2 something and at 3:15. Couldn’t go back to sleep so I put on a meditation CD. Ate at 6. Smoothie finished at 7:30. It is 11 a.m. and I feel like I have been punched in the gut. Burping. Had a PET Scan scheduled for 2 p.m. I had to fast for 6 hours. Injected with radioactive dye (doesn’t that sound lovely!) and had to wait for an hour. Then I was led into a room with a large machine, similar to the MRI machine. I “got comfortable” on the scanning bed, was raised into place, and was reminded to be still. These machines are very noisy! After something like 40 minutes, all of the moving, whirring and banging stopped. I had a lot of strange thoughts run through my mind during that procedure, even though I tried to meditate.
Day 25, 10/9 (Tuesday): Woke at 11:30 p.m. and 2:30 a.m. Put on music. Dozed at 3:30. Took a walk at 9 a.m. Actually sweated! (My body doesn’t ever sweat.) Appointment with Dr Mathais at 10:30 a.m., Dr. Sones at 11:30 a.m. Felt great after. Noticed that my salivary gland duct is irritated. Been taking the Bone and Joint formula from Youngevity, because Dr. Wallach said gingivitis was a form of osteoporosis of the jaw. And it seems as if I either have a new salivary gland stone in front of the other one OR, I can hope, the one that has been stuck is breaking up and moving toward the duct opening, thereby irritating it. We will see.
Day 31, 10/16 (Tuesday): Woke at 2:30 a.m., peed. Woke at 3:15, muscle cramp started. I could feel my foot moving with cramp while starting to stretch like normal. Turned leg to put cramping muscle (upside of calf) against mat. Could feel tingling (of electron exchange?), and twitching. Felt small movements of foot and ankle. Was a challenge to let it go, surrender to what was happening. Finally muscle relaxed and tingling stopped. Woke at 4:15 a.m., felt refreshed and relaxed. Good sleep. Gland hurts (pinches) though. Good day at work. Home, ate, to Boy Scouts Court of Honor. Listened to some of the subliminal messages given to me by Dr. Sones. Bed at 9 p.m. Fell asleep to meditation. Woke at 11:30 to pee.
10/25 (Thursday): Gland is swollen and hurts. 10/26 (Friday): Had stone removed. It was huge. Procedure was a bit more involved than I expected. He really had to dig deep to find the stone; it took a good bit of time. I am so glad he didn’t give up. Was worn out afterwards. Home to rest. Melissa brought Advil and green juice.
10/27 (Saturday): Rested and stayed on a liquid diet. Mostly comfort food – lentil soup pureed. Yum.