I woke up feeling “gross” and “clogged”; I visualized the old Drano commercials with the clogged drains. I felt greasy, toxi, nauseous, my skin was crawling. I wanted to be sick to expel “it.”

I did go to the bathroom and expelled a bit of greasy. 

At seminar group dinner, I did tell about feeling an expectation that I am letting go, and have a surrender tattoo to remind me. No more expectation or goal that healing has to be within a time limit. It is on its own schedule. 

Surrender. 

So, the creativity seminar is about creating a blank slate from which creativity can arise. So for my body to heal, I must get to that blank slate and clear myself of all expectations (a forceful energy to which one can rebel and push in the opposite direction of expectation); judgments … as in “if I don’t heal in 6 months, then I am a failure”  (yeah, I am competitive, that is in there); AND get rid of any toxic emotions that might be hanging around. 

Surrender to be able to create what I desire.

Surrender.

Then Virginia mentioned World of Warcraft and other video games. I said, “In our days, that was called Dungeons and Dragons.” This set off a conversation about setting up a game day, as Virginia has all of the stuff. By the way, I have wanted to play Dungeons and Dragons, like 30 years ago. What I got from this conversation is that you CAN get what you want, just not necessarily in your time frame. 

I went into the seminar and shared.